The Battle of the Pacifier
I find myself in a bit of a predicament these days.
Before Annie was born Steven and I decided that we would allow her to have a pacifier (which was good since the NICU gave her one without asking us). There are lots of reasons, but the two main reasons were (1) it'd be really nice to have an "instant quiet" device for when we were at church, on an airplane, etc... (2) Most children either suck on a pacifier or their fingers. It's easier to take away the pacifier than it is fingers.
So here's the problem:
In order to fall asleep (unless its a 4am feeding where she can barely hold her own head up), she needs this thing. She has to have it. So, we plug it in her mouth... we even put a blanket in front of it to help hold it in (please hold any comments about this). She usually stays quiet for a good 10 minutes. And then. Then, it starts. The passy falls out and the crying begins. She is becoming mobile-ish and likes to throw her head back to get comfortable which usually dislocates the blanket and the pacifier ends up under her cheek or down by her shoulder. I walk in, put it back in, put the blanket back... and the process repeats. I'm sure a lot of you moms know what I'm talking about here. I cannot tell you the amount of times I have had to walk into her room today to plug that stupid thing back in.
Sometimes... I just let her cry. I give her ten minutes and walk in to calm her. I pat her, I rub her, I "shhh" her... nothing works. I even pick her up. She calms down but those little eyes pop open. I put her in bed and immediately she starts wailing. If I let her she will cry another 10-15 minutes. So, I plug the passy back in, situate the blanket.. and we start over. There are times when she will actually fall into a deep sleep and the passy will fall out of her mouth and she never even notices. However, the majority of the time - we fight the battle of the pacifier. Ive read that when babies start falling into REM sleep that they sometimes wake and cry... and maybe this is true of her, but then she notices the pacifier isnt around and ... well, you know.
Here's my predicament:
Do I take this blasted thing away or not? I'd still much rather her have her pacifier than be a finger sucker... but I have just about had it with plugging this thing in countless times during a two hour nap. And I know that it cant be good for her because she can't really fall into a deep sleep. I ordered her some wubbanubs (pacifiers attached to little animals) and actually discovered that we had one. We still run into the same problem with them. Is it possible to let them have the pacifier during those emergency times and not at nap times or would this throw her into a frenzy? Should we let her keep it or take it away? Is there a better way to let her have it during sleep but keep from plugging it in? I'm wondering what you moms out there have to say about this! What's your experience with pacifiers? That's right.. I'm opening the table for discussion! I only ask that you stay on topic ... things like this tend to have lots of bunny trails :)
Please leave any comments you may have below!
Looking forward to what you have to say!
Before Annie was born Steven and I decided that we would allow her to have a pacifier (which was good since the NICU gave her one without asking us). There are lots of reasons, but the two main reasons were (1) it'd be really nice to have an "instant quiet" device for when we were at church, on an airplane, etc... (2) Most children either suck on a pacifier or their fingers. It's easier to take away the pacifier than it is fingers.
So here's the problem:
In order to fall asleep (unless its a 4am feeding where she can barely hold her own head up), she needs this thing. She has to have it. So, we plug it in her mouth... we even put a blanket in front of it to help hold it in (please hold any comments about this). She usually stays quiet for a good 10 minutes. And then. Then, it starts. The passy falls out and the crying begins. She is becoming mobile-ish and likes to throw her head back to get comfortable which usually dislocates the blanket and the pacifier ends up under her cheek or down by her shoulder. I walk in, put it back in, put the blanket back... and the process repeats. I'm sure a lot of you moms know what I'm talking about here. I cannot tell you the amount of times I have had to walk into her room today to plug that stupid thing back in.
Sometimes... I just let her cry. I give her ten minutes and walk in to calm her. I pat her, I rub her, I "shhh" her... nothing works. I even pick her up. She calms down but those little eyes pop open. I put her in bed and immediately she starts wailing. If I let her she will cry another 10-15 minutes. So, I plug the passy back in, situate the blanket.. and we start over. There are times when she will actually fall into a deep sleep and the passy will fall out of her mouth and she never even notices. However, the majority of the time - we fight the battle of the pacifier. Ive read that when babies start falling into REM sleep that they sometimes wake and cry... and maybe this is true of her, but then she notices the pacifier isnt around and ... well, you know.
Here's my predicament:
Do I take this blasted thing away or not? I'd still much rather her have her pacifier than be a finger sucker... but I have just about had it with plugging this thing in countless times during a two hour nap. And I know that it cant be good for her because she can't really fall into a deep sleep. I ordered her some wubbanubs (pacifiers attached to little animals) and actually discovered that we had one. We still run into the same problem with them. Is it possible to let them have the pacifier during those emergency times and not at nap times or would this throw her into a frenzy? Should we let her keep it or take it away? Is there a better way to let her have it during sleep but keep from plugging it in? I'm wondering what you moms out there have to say about this! What's your experience with pacifiers? That's right.. I'm opening the table for discussion! I only ask that you stay on topic ... things like this tend to have lots of bunny trails :)
Please leave any comments you may have below!
Looking forward to what you have to say!
Here is my experience and opinions on Paci's. I am in no way saying this is how you should do it, just MY experience/opinion. I'm sure you will find what works best for you. With that being said here it goes...
ReplyDeleteNoah took a paci. It took a couple weeks to finally get him to take it. I nursed so I really liked him having one so he didn't use me as one. He used it at church and other places where he needed to be quiet. You could certainly try to give it to Annie during times you want her to be quiet. No rule against a special occasion binki. :) They are a wonderful invention. We slowly weened him with NO TROUBLE at all. Church was the last place we took it away at. It was nice for there.
Wyatt and Elayna both REFUSED! We tried and tried. They have both, Ellie still does, used me for a paci! It's no fun! Wy had tons of health problems and would have been happier I think if he'd had a paci. Elayna is whiny so a paci would have been great, she really likes to chew things and she uses me and well no one is too happy about that arrangement. Side note: neither Wy nor Elayna have sucked their fingers/thumbs and neither had paci's. So I think some kids do and some don't. They both have bit the fingers once in a while when they were teething hard. I'd give them a little Tylenol and they were quit. So it was just a "my teeth are hurting" sign.
Noah's paci did fall out and he did cry some at night. But I would listen to the cry and let him "cry it out" unless it was a hurt cry. If you can't already, you will know the difference. Not to say you should let your angel cry it out, but it worked for us. He cried a long while, almost an hour the first time. I was beside myself with Charley. WE WERE CRYING. But the next time it was less time just over a half hour. The next time 15 min. The next time five min. Then it got to where he was trying to jump from my arms to the crib and if the binki fell it fell no big deal. It was HARD, but he learned to self soothe. Now that's not to say I didn't get him at night. I would get him to feed him and change him, but after his needs were met, we would put him in the crib and he was perfectly happy.
We have let the our other two precious angels cry it out too and they have done it binki less. White noise was our best friend when they were tiny, but after a few months we didn't have to play any noise for them and they go to bed super easy. The white noise wasn't a necessity, just was nice to block out the extra sounds and make them feel comforted.
I'm sure you'll get lots of opinions and we will pray that you find what works for you quickly. Fussy babies are hard on the whole family. Love you girl!
That's good advice! Thank you Nicole!
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